Risk it for Jesus

"Compassion breaks through social structure. When you stand for me (Jesus) and my heart for someone, you stand inside me. People don't see you they see me. This is why it is so important to leave self effort behind, because when you are within me you have different protection and freedom. You are operating in an uncharted range of effectiveness lifted so far beyond the way this world works. You will access in my Spirit great receptiveness to my presence as you stand with people. Religion might point and say these people will corrupt you, but when you are inside of me and allow my acceptance to be released through you, these people will be relieved by the chance to be consumed in Love. Do not be afraid to be vulnerable, to risk for my Spirit."

I was hearing this and at the same time wrestling with being a woman and being called to reach out to absolutely whomever God asks me to, regardless of any social standing. Now I'm not talking about doing stupid stuff and putting ourselves in dumb situations, obviously...common sense is a great gift from God. But there are safe, real and healthy times when God will ask me to push the envelope. To express compassion even though it seems like I shouldn't be the one doing it. Like someone else should--just to be on the safe side. Well, not everyone will have the impression of the great compassion of God all the time during prayer. What if it's me? Am I going to sit on my hands? Mary Magdalene "shouldn't" have been the one anointing Jesus' feet. Jesus "shouldn't" have been the one speaking to the woman at the well. The Samaritan "shouldn't" have helped the man on the road. The risks we take for Jesus greatly glorify Him. A God of "shouldn'ts". All our shouldn'ts are the points over which God turns on the spigot of the miraculous...the spigot of Love pouring into lives. God honestly doesn't see man or woman when He looks at us. He sees His image. He made us with our identity of course, and He planned us this way for reasons, of course. But if we always hold onto our world's standards for what our identity should look like, we don't get to soar in that place with Jesus where nothing matters but the heart and the moment. We instantly recoil from that place because it seems so vulnerable (not to mention way to easy and simple). In reality, there's so much protection for us there. We have no idea how much. A soft heart is a strong heart, an invincible heart. A heart so infused with God it becomes made up of heavenly stuff. Different cells. Crazy talk? There are people all over the world dying for Jesus, and they're not doing it because they decided to be strong enough to prove a point. They're doing it for Love, not Romeo and Juliet love. That's diminished. No this is LOVE. (Luke 7:36-50) This woman was messed up and she poured expensive, expensive perfume on Jesus and rubbed it in with her hair and mingled it with her tears. She was loved. She knew she was loved. She knew Jesus was loved by the Father. She knew He was Love in love's very essence. She and Jesus had no qualms about loving in front of Pharisees. What if this woman would have unhealthfully attached herself to Jesus? (Because isn't that what we're all so afraid of?) He's God. I'm pretty sure He would have perfectly walked her through it. Why are we embarrassed and afraid for Him? He doesn't need our guidance or help. As we take risks (in a heart of common sense) are we confident in our God? Does He know how to walk with people? If so then He knows how to walk with us, and our pure risks produce beyond measure. There are some things we don't have to always qualify.

I'm challenged to stop saying I will never know God's love...I will never get it. In my own life I see I have sometimes construed a portion of Ephesians to be a really comfy exit strategy. "I'm exempt from understanding and living out God's love because I'll never be able to know it."
The Word says more than that. God says that He can give us power to "grasp" His love, though it's beyond mental nailing down. So if I'm after the heart of God more than making sense out of Him in my head, my ideas about love will shift and I will encounter more relationship with Him.
Everything Jesus did was a revelation of God's love for people, and they got it! He went into their hearts and they were fully able to receive Him. I believe we can prepare to be surprised by the capacity for love and true compassion God will give us. If we don't have, maybe we just forgot to ask, because Jesus is willing! (Yes, it's Scriptural).

Ephesians 3:14
"For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom His whole family in heaven and on earth derives it's name. I pray that out of His glorious riches He may strengthen you with power through His Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge--that you may be filled with all the measure of all the fullness of God."

Even though we can't "ask or imagine", ALL the measure of ALL the fullness of God is ours. And we don't have to worry. Our perfect God can perfectly handle a bunch of Spirit-filled risk takers.

He Can be Trusted!

"For I tell you that Christ (the Messiah) became a servant and a minister to the circumcised (the Jews) in order to show God's truthfulness and honesty by confirming (verifying) the promises given to our fathers. And also in order that the Gentiles (nations) might glorify God for His mercy (not covenanted) to them. As it is written, Therefore I will praise You among the Gentiles and sing praises to your name. Again it is said, Rejoice (exult) O Gentiles, along with His (own) people; And again, Praise the Lord, all you Gentiles, and let all the peoples praise Him!"
Romans 15: 8-11 Amplified

Here is a God who gives. Knowing our history, I read this and am completely astounded again by God. He keeps His word (especially though fought against) to show Himself completely truthful, honest, faithful and committed to us. Then, as if that weren't enough, He pours out mercy even in places He never bound Himself. What a revelation that God does not feel obligated to us, nor does He move or love out of obligation,manipulation or force. He is a Lover. He doesn't deny His own perfectly holy passion. Lively committment is His entire being, and thanks to God, we get in on all the enjoyment! We enjoy Him, He enjoys us....Joy all around....and glory all around.

Moon Walk

Nice night for a walk. I love the moon.
Sometimes clouds look like the ocean, when they pace over a sky
Backlighted with green-blue space bulbs
Have you ever seen night clouds rush?
Stars stand still and waves move past them
But nothing dislodges
Sky is different from ocean; Ocean floor moves
Atmosphere stands still and star pages turn within it
Ocean changes, sky is numerous, more so than humanity's mind
In some ways the same, deep and high
Astounding waves above me and below me, in town I see
Sky and think of ocean
Both brought near
The moon smiles and glows, bright and whole
Full, low, floating with
The winsome lull

funnel

a picture started to unfold in my head of the world in darkness and me as a little funnel somewhere in the midst. and there was a huge white cloud hovering over the earth, but the cloud couldn't descend to come in contact with the darkness. the cloud needed a funnel. and the cloud was a lot bigger than the world. the cloud could fill all the darkness if it just had a few funnels to use. and when the cloud saw that it could use me as a funnel, it did.

the picture was so intense, because if the darkness is big, then the love of god is so much bigger. the darkness won't put it out. it can't, because it's not big enough. but there is a lot of it, and it is dark. as the light of the cloud started funneling through me and the stream of light got brighter and more intense, my little funnel started to shake and shudder like it was funneling the tail of a rocket through it. i don't know what that part means... but it gave me hope. god is bigger. his love is more intense than my darkness, and than that of anyone i come in contact with. i hope i am a little funnel, allowing his light into the world. and if it breaks me in the end, loving that much, then so be it. there is nothing else worthwhile.

set down your burdens.

--Joanna Shoemaker

Holiday Prayer

Jesus, I don't want to miss out on what you are doing this season--on what you have for me or my family. I want to hit the mark your Spirit is putting before me. Lord I pray that you would clear my focus, be God of my words and of my thoughts...especially of everything that comes out of my mouth. It's so easy to be frustrated by people in the store, on the road--or even in my home. Protect me from that frustration, God. Break it off my life at the root and as the enemy tries to assault me. I pray instead that I would hide myself away in you, so that you can speak to me and you can draw me and meet me. Lord, there's such a high expectation for enjoyment on these times, and so there's that pressure we put on each other to be perfect, so the atmosphere will be perfect. Jesus, we want so much to be happy, but we will never find that perfection except in you. The hours will go by and it will soon be "the day after Thanksgiving", and "the day after Christmas." God I pray that all of our hope would be set on you. I pray that in a new way you will be the center of our tables. God as we eat I pray that our thoughts would turn to you, how much you have always done for us, and that we would also have our hearts opened to sense how great your future plans are for us. I pray for your peace. I pray for a miracle of peace, that we would turn ourselves to you, God, and that you would come and settle us down.

I yield my desire for things to be a certain way, look a certain way, feel a certain way. I pray not for a filling of great feelings, but for a greater filling of your Holy Spirit. I pray that your Holy Spirit would captivate me and those I love. That we would seek to spend hours with each other in your presence, that we would experience for real your love for us. Thank you that we don't have to worry about what anyone thinks of us--we are free to live and move and have our being in you.

I pray that we will finish this season well. I pray that we will look back on what you have done in lives with excitement, be free of the dread of credit card bills, and have memories of key moments when you met us. If we have conflict I pray that we will respond in the opposite Spirit because we have taken the time to let you cover us and affirm us. I pray for favor with family members and peace as is possible in households. I ask for patience for all of us, and faith, that we could minister your move fearlessly.

Most of all, I pray that none of this would be accomplished because we relied on ourselves, but because we are in love with you and your Spirit has carried us. May we truly soar this year on your beautiful heart for us and the intimacy we have with you, our Strong Dad who is rejoicing over us that by his grace we have have been more than conquerors in 2010.

In Jesus Name, Amen

Tuesday Morning

When my life has been poured out, I can't expect to remember all the good God has done through me. It is not mine to claim. There's no tally of my credentials. He is so kind that He will remind me (when I need it) not to forget how much He has already accomplished through me in a short time, but the fear of a wasted life is my flesh being consumed. My life has not been wasted. It has been Him. Only one matter I am to remember: He has had His way, and I am gladly lost in Him.

The one lost in Christ will be too obsessed with Him to be self conscious. Will we waste our earthly lives to pour Him out over the heads of His beloved and the ones He has called?

I want to look red--I want to look like the red letters. I will be obsessed with the words, with the heart of the red letters. With Jesus. When people look at me they will see life-blood, they will see passion. They will see Jesus. NOTHING else matters. These are fierce words--unyielding words. They will lead me often into sorrow and conflict, yet into an even greater joy. If I do not gain Christ I'm a prisoner to the greatest sorrow of all...the sorrow with no light to penetrate darkness. I will have lost my soul.

If I want to accomplish something in my lifetime, I will accomplish sacrificing everything to love God. I will accomplish letting Him move me to love people.

Minutes

I hear reminders from the Holy Spirit almost constantly now when I become discouraged or feel myself slipping into any kind of despair or survival mode, that God's mercy and His work in me to bring healing is available to me at any instant. A day is as a thousand years to Him. So I might be in the middle of a busy moment at home, around town or with people, and God wants to speak. He can make an exchange with me instantaneously if I will pour out my heart like water, and take the childlike position that He is a willing friend tangibly with me, ready to hear me out and move on my need. This is where I could lose my footing--if I forget how near He always is in me, around me and through me. We desire more because we can have more. We were made for more. To kill the desires we feel for relationship, intimacy, wholeness and passion for life throughout any one of our days is to push God away. He gave us those desires so that we can become full of Him. He does not demand that we exist disappointed. I realize this can be a painful statement, but we can rise up. We can because He is with us. The difference is expectation.

"For a thousand years in Your sight are but as yesterday when it is past, or as a watch in the night." Psalm 90:4

I want my moments to matter. I don't want my 5 minutes to be wasted because I was waiting for an unbroken hour to give God. Yah it's lovely when we do have those longer times, but life is life, God is God. He knows we have to do stuff. We have a partnership with Him in everything. The mystery and secret for us is that everything can change in one moment fully yielded to God.

Turn to God. "God I have a few minutes, and I am so discouraged. What do you want to do with me?" Then expect, expect, expect to maybe see a picture, hear a truth, feel comfort and hope. The more practiced we are the easier recognizing God gets. I love what Graham Cooke says, "It's like driving a car. It's not hard. It just takes practice and then soon it's automatic!" We are touched by God and before we even notice, "our minutes" have become a whole day of communion. Life does not stop to make room for God. God is life.

"We may plead for mercy for a lifetime in unbelief, and at the end of our days be still no more than sadly hopeful that we shall somewhere, sometime, receive it. This is to starve to death just outside the banquet hall in which we have been warmly invited. Or we may, if we will, lay hold of the mercy of God by faith, enter the hall, and sit down with the bold and avid souls who will not allow diffidence and unbelief to keep them from the feast of fat things prepared for them."
--A.W. Tozer

"Whom have I in heaven but You? And I have no delight or desire on earth besides You....it is good for me to draw near to God; I have put my trust in the Lord God and made Him my refuge.."
Psalm 73: 25, 28a